Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Not falling back into old habits

So this journey so far has already taught me so much. The 'old Rachel' would normally fall back on the things that comforted her when she was sad or stressed or angry...food, cigarettes, alcohol....not necessarily in that order. The death of a friend or family member, the dissolution of a relationship, the stress levels of her job...all of these would drive the 'old Rachel' to drink, smoke, and eat. But something happened last night that made me realize that the 'old Rachel' is being replaced by a new, better Rachel. Last night, I went and worked out with Judith and Jen and raced home to cook dinner and start watching Monday Night Football....for those of you that don't know, I'm a Dallas Cowboy fan and last night they played against the Philadelpia Eagles. So needless to say, I was excited to get home and watch the game. I rushed inside once I got home and asked my mom to quick change the channel so I could see what the score was. Then I rushed upstairs, got dinner cooked and down to the basement I went to watch the rest of the game. In my first blog, I talked about the things that have led me to this path. A boy who broke my heart. Well, that boy was on my mind a lot last night. You see, he's a Cowboys fan also. And we used to text each other during the games or watch the game together. One of the first times I hung out with him was on a Sunday night during which the Eagles beat the Cowboys three years ago. It made me sad. I had no one to text during the game and was acting a big fool screaming and yelling at the tv all by myself. It made me miss him. I have been so busy working out these past six or seven weeks that I haven't really had time to think about him...let alone miss him. But I did last night. And so after the game, I went upstairs to get my food ready for today and I told my mom how I was feeling. The comment she made was "Now, don't go eating wrong!" (She also talked to me about everything else but that comment just goes to show she knows the 'old Rachel' better than I do!!) But I didn't eat wrong. I just made my lunch with tears streaming down my face, missing him. Then I stopped crying and went downstairs proud that I didn't feel the need to smoke, drink or eat just because I was having a bad half hour. This journey is helping me learn how to deal with things that happen in my life on my own and without a crutch. I don't need to eat or drink or smoke to "fix" me. Don't get me wrong - there will be times that I will eat something that isn't part of the plan....I will have some drinks every once in a while....I WON'T smoke but I'll want to. But I am really becoming stronger...physically and emotionally. I can't thank Judith enough for the opportunities she's given me. I can't be more grateful to the people that I've met that support and encourage me and are always there for me. And to all my friends that I haven't seen in what seems like years.....thanks for leaving your comments, supporting and encouraging me and most of all....for understanding why I'm not around right now. I love you all!

Friday, September 12, 2008

On my way......

So I got my most recent circumference measurements from Judith last night and I am so excited to say that so far, I have lost a total of 13.25 inches. I have included a breakdown below:

-1/4 inch Neck
-1/2 inch Hips
-1/4 inch each Calve
-1/2 inch left Bicep (right stayed same)
-3 inches Waist
-5 3/4 inches Umbilicus
-2 3/4 Chest (not bustline)

I did have a slight gain in my thighs but that is not uncommon. I gained 3/4 in my right thigh and 1/4 in my left.

For those of you that don't know, I am also participating in a Biggest Loser-ish competition at work. It has been going on for five weeks now. It is a weekly competition and awards are given out based on weight lost and points accumulated (points are given for water, correct food choices, exercise and are taken away for eating sweets or drinking sodas). This week, I won the weight loss portion and was only 17 points away from the highest points. This is very exciting for me to have won at least ONE week since my going to the Biggest Loser Casting and sharing that experience was a catlalyst for getting this competition started at work.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Body Distortion

Over the past two weeks, I have learned just how distorted my view of my OWN BODY is! And I've realized that I don't know how to take a compliment. When someone tells me that I look thinner or that my pants are getting too big for me......instead of saying 'Thank you' I say....Oh, shut up! And I laugh and shake my head and change the subject. Why? Partly because I am not good at accepting a compliment...but I've realized (in the past two days really) that that's only a small part of it. The larger part of it is that I may see the changes that my body is going through but I still see a big fat blob in the mirror. I think I am the biggest chick in any room.....I feel like I've got the biggest rolls, the largest double chin, the flabbiest arms....In short, I always think that there can never possibly be someone that weighs more than me......I must be the fattest person on the planet! This past week I've gotten a lot of comments on my weight loss...people have really been noticing the difference in my body and making sure to tell me that they notice. People at work, my friends and family....my team members. So yesterday, I took a really long, hard look at myself in the mirror (YIKES - LOL)) and really looked at the new flatness in my tummy, the smaller back fat rolls, the cut in my arms, the muscles in my legs.....and I know that one of the things I need to work on is my view of my body. I may not be thin and as healthy as I should be yet....but I'm getting there. Today, I am so proud of my body - I am proud that my donut tummy is shrinking...that my flag arms are getting tighter....that my face is losing some of it's 'baby' fat and my cheekbones are starting to show.......and from now on, I'm going to try so hard to say 'Thank you' when someone pays me a compliment instead of 'Shut up'......I just need someone to kick me in the ass if I go too far to the other extreme and start thinking I'm all that and wearing things that are just plain wrong....girls...you know what I mean!!!! LOL

Friday, September 5, 2008

End of week thoughts

So it’s the end of week one of the 2008 Body Makeover Challenge. It’s been hectic and chaotic. The holiday weekend, appointments at the chiropractor, work outs and seminars…..they’ve all contributed to the chaos. My life consists of work, Judith, my team, and sleep. I’ve spent a total of probably an hour - two at the most - with my mom and my dogs this week. I haven’t seen my best friend or her children in about a month. I haven’t watched Jeopardy in six weeks! (I used to watch five nights a week to keep my brain healthy!) It is a rather ‘disconnected’ feeling from my life and I have to keep reminding myself that it’s the path to a better life. A longer, healthier life that will totally benefit not only me, but my family, friends and pets!! It’s hard to stay focused and encouraged somedays. But I am focused. And encouraged. It is so great to see everyone working hard to attain their goals. To achieve such great personal accomplishments. It’s great to be on the same path with so many others…going through the same things….having the same feelings….So today I just wanted to reaffirm my pledge to my health, to my team, everyone involved in this challenge, to Judith….I am here for the duration. I am committed to changing my life. I am blessed with this opportunity, blessed by the people I’ve met and blessed that we are on this journey together.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Week One

It's been a super hectic, super crazy week thus far. For those of you that don't know, in addition to my 9-5 job, I also work part time at a bar and I have a cleaning business on the side....all of that in addition to being a part of the BMC kept me very busy this weekend.

So here we are - the 2nd day of the challenge and I am missing the workout due to a prior committment. But I did work out on Monday as instructed by Judith (Man....I LOVE the 300's...aye aye aye) and we had a group work out last night so that's good. Tonight I am going to a concert (3Doors Down baby!!) at Red Rocks so I'll get a workout in that way. And tomorrow it is ON LIKE LIKE DONKEY KONG!!

Since this blog is to keep my friends and family in the loop....I'm going to just do a quick update for them.

At this date, I am now over 5 weeks clean and sober...LOL....seriously though, I haven't had a drop of alcohol since Saturday July 26th. And I am also proud to say that my last cigarette was smoked at about 8:30 or 9:00 pm on Monday, August 25th. So far...so good.

We have been offered the opportunity to visit a chiropractor, free of charge, four times throughout the challenge. My consultation visit is tomorrow and if necessary, I can make three appointments for follow up visits if adjustments are needed. It's truly amazing what this challenge provides to us contestants for such a minimal cost.

The way the challenge works is as follows:

Monday - *Option to train with Judith. If we opt out, we can either work out on our own or with our team.
Tuesday & Thursday - 1.5 hour to 2 hour workout with Judith.
Wednesday - Team work out
Friday - Seminars (nutrition, proper foot wear, etc.)
Sunday - Team Challenge

*The Monday option is a cost option - we have to pay in order to participate. In light of how much time and effort Judith is spending with us for just this challenge, I am opting to pay and train with her every Monday for the duration of the challenge.

We are required to work out a minimum of 8 hours a week - not including the weekend challenge. It's intense and challenging and I am so looking forward to it!!

Our first challenge is a hike on Sunday September 7th in Roxborough State Park. We'll be meeting at 7:00 am to begin.......I'll let you know how it goes.

In the meantime, I want to give a shout out to my team - TEAM CRUSH. You rocked last night!
Jen - You rocked as usual...but next time, I expect you to jog it back! You know!!! LOL
Toni - Where did all that energy come from? Something tells me you had your "focused face" on last night!
Carisa - You inspire me.
Cindy - Knee surgery? What knee surgery? You were great last night!! I'm so proud.
Rikki - Great, great, great job!! You go girl!
Dana Dane - Keep that heart rate accelerated!!! You were awesome.

I can't wait til Sunday when we get to show off our team shirts (Thanks Rikki & Cindy!). I think we are a strong, determined team and I am so proud to be with you on this journey.

Love, Peace and Fitness!!